Friday, September 11, 2009

The Football Betting Thrill Ride Is About To Begin!



There's nothing like wagering on sports.

Nothing.

Oh, you haven't tried it? What's the matta-wich-yoo?

Now I've heard all the excuses. "I like watching sports for the pure athletic nature of it." Or "I don't want to have to go against my own team."

It's all garbage.

Come on, people. A little "sweet action" on the side, isn't going to turn you into Art Schlischter. Probably...

To gamble a little something on a football game, is to live so vicariously through every single stupid play, that you'll feel more alive than you ever have watching a game. You'll have a real stake in the outcome. Even if it's just a lousy $20 bucks.

Plus, when you win, there's a chest thumping satisfaction that comes with it which is hard to describe, almost like beating your most hated rival.

This is not to say, there will not be heartache and frustration. Ohhh, trust me, there will be. You will go through cold streaks. You will suffer bad beats. You will get whipsawed by injury and penalties. A ref's call will almost certainly steal a win from your back pocket.

Some weeks, you will look at the point spreads, and they will appear as confusing as Chinese trigonometry.

But you will be more involved with football than ever! And you need not do anything to ever compromise your rooting interest in your favorite team.

It's a big league. Roam around. You've got 30 other teams to wager on each week!

>>>>>>>>>>>>>

With that... here's Jimmy Masterlock's picks for Week 1, as heard on Bob and Brian in the Morning on 102.9 The Hog.

Dallas -6 vs. Tampa Bay (Jimmy Sez: Tampa will be a 4 win team this year)
Minnesota -3.5 at Cleveland (Jimmy Sez: Nobody ever went broke betting against the Browns!)
Detroit +13 at New Orleans (Jimmy Sez: A rookie QB vs. one of the most potent offenses in the league? Something doesn't smell right. This game should be 19 or 20, right? RUN to the smell. Dumpster dive!)

and... the "Barking Dog" of the week, where you may want the points, you may like the points, but YOU ARE NOT GOING TO NEED THEM!

Miami +4 @ Atlanta (Jimmy Sez: These are two suprise 11 win teams from last year, but the Fish will prove last year was more legit than fluke.)

>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Finally, given that we are in the worst recession since Max Headroom and Members Only Jackets were all the rage, I am proud to offer up three easy contests for you guys to partake in, all for FREE!

The first one is our Leinenkugel Pick 'Em game, which is as simple as it gets. Just pick the games (no spreads) and the weekly winner gets an awesome autographed Beer Tube to pour some of your favorite Leinie's into!



The second game, is the pick a game, predict the score contest sponsored by Milwaukee Harley. This one too is simple play, although winning the bitchin' "Fat Bob" is going to be one helluva Hail Mary.

Just pick a game and fire in the exact score you predict. Then of all the entries that week, ONE person's game will be activated as "live" for a chance to win the Harley. All you gotta do then, is sit back and watch your Nostradamus like prediction come home. Vrooom.... vrooom!



Finally, my guy Paul Charchian (Fantasy Guru from Minneapolis) set up a deal through Best Buy with us, so you can play against me every week in a fantasy game for both bragging rights (always fun) and cool Best Buy prizes. (even funner!)





Takes a few minutes longer (you hate your boss, though, go ahead!) but once your fantasy lineup is set, you at least have a little taste of fantasy each week in case you don't have any real friends for a league, or simply quit the one you were once a part of in total disgust. (Trust me, I've been there!)

So there you go, folks. Happy football. Does life get any better than right now? I doubt it...

5 comments:

  1. This is the most moronic, inconsiderate and even damaging post I've seen an E list celebrity ever make. Shame on you Mr. Czaben.

    ReplyDelete
  2. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Easy Benny Boy... Stop bein' all anti-American and let ole Czabe do his part for the economy... For real bro, did you read past the beginning to the "stop being a d-bag and have some fun" ,for FREE, part... Bro... Beer Tubes free? NICE! Chance at a Hog? YES! Other goodies that temp the eager sports radio fan? RIGHT! Further more bro... "E" list? He's is loved and hated around the nation... THE NATION!!! So throw aside commenting ever again, go to the readers poll, giggle as you descide which tastefully represented lady you gonna deposit in the "spank bank", and thank "Mr. Czaben" for having so appreciation for his listeners to organize such things... Thanks Czabe, and company for the chance to win some s**t... I love it...

    ReplyDelete