Whitewashing The Rigged NBA Lottery Evidence

Oh, you just knew it was only a matter of time before this happened.

The damning evidence of how the NBA ensured Patrick Ewing landed in New York in 1985, has been scrubbed from YouTube. Because of course, it is such valuable, profitable, proprietary sports television content from almost 30 years ago.

This was Bill Simmons best work, back when he was less afraid to rattle cages....

Just in case they pull down the clip between the time we post this blog and the time you read this, here's what happens: when an accountant from Ernst & Whinney throws the seven envelopes into the glass drum, he bangs the fourth one against the side of the drum to create a creased corner (we'll explain why this is relevant in a second). Then he pulls a handle and turns the drum around a couple of times to "mix" the envelopes up. At the 5:23 mark of the clip, Stern heads over to the drum, unlocks it and awkwardly reaches inside for the first envelope (the No. 1 pick). He grabs three envelopes that are bunched together, pretends not to look (although he does) and flips the three envelopes so the one on the bottom ends up in his hand. 

Then he pulls that envelope out at the 5:32 mark ... and, of course, it's the Knicks envelope. 

Now ... 

A reader named Greg K. from Fair Lawn, N.J. (I'd give you his whole name, but I don't want him to be randomly found dead in his bathtub tonight), pointed this out to me: If you look closely right at the 5:31 mark, right as the commish yanks that Knicks envelope out, there's a noticeable crease in the corner of the envelope. You can see it for a split-second -- as he pulls the envelope up, it's on the corner that's pointing toward the bottom of the jar. 

There's a giant crease! It's right there! The same one the accountant created as he was throwing the envelopes into the drum! 

So you're telling me that, out of the seven envelopes in that glass drum, during a lottery when the NBA desperately needed the most ballyhooed college center in 15 years to save the league's marquee franchise, the commissioner coincidentally pulled out the envelope with a giant crease in the corner that happened to have the Knicks logo in it? This is the Zapruder film of sports tapes, isn't it?

Yes, Bill. It really IS the Zapruder Film of sports. But now, it's gone. If anybody has a new link, let us know. It really shows you just how SENSITIVE the league is to this particular criticism of that foggy June night in 1985, doesn't it?

Just Me and My Adult Idiot Golfing Buddies

In case you were curious how we do things, here's a re-cap of the weekend. No, I still can't believe I won, and can't believe that for once in my life I was, indisputably "clutch."

You put this victory next to my last (and only other) golf tournament win - the 1985 PG County Jr. Amatuer - and I'd say you have a pretty good career, no?

Jason Collins, The Magical Gay Elf Basketball Player

Kudos to openly gay writer Bret Easton Ellis who slammed the media coverage of NBA scrub Jason Collins' and his "heroic" act of coming out....

Was I the only gay man of a certain demo who experienced a flicker of annoyance in the way the media treated Jason Collins as some kind of baby panda who needed to be honored and praised and consoled and—yes—infantilized by his coming out on the cover of Sports Illustrated? Within the tyrannical homophobia of the sports world, that any man would come out as gay (let alone a black man) is not only an LGBT triumph but also a triumph for pranksters everywhere who thrilled to the idea that what should be considered just another neutral fact that is nobody’s business was instead a shock heard around the world, one that added another jolt of transparency to an increasingly transparent planet. It was an undeniable moment and also extremely cool. Jason Collins is the future. But the subsequent fawning over Collins simply stating he is gay still seemed to me, as another gay man, like a new kind of victimization. (George Stephanopoulos interviewed him so tenderly, it was as if he was talking to a six-year-old boy.) In another five years hopefully this won’t matter, but for now we’re trapped in the times we live in. The reign of The Gay Man as Magical Elf, who whenever he comes out appears before us as some kind of saintly E.T. whose sole purpose is to be put in the position of reminding us only about Tolerance and Our Own Prejudices and To Feel Good About Ourselves and to be a symbol instead of just being a gay dude, is—lamentably—still in media play.

Of course, the media sucking up to Collins, and the cause in general, continues in full force. ESPN boss John Skipper went as far as to issue another apology for Chris Broussard's personal opinion - based on his faith - about homosexuality.

“I think we did great other than we made one mistake: The mistake was not being more careful with Chris Broussard, and there is a collective responsibility there. Chris Broussard’s job was to come on and talk about the news of the league, how the league was representing it, and through a series of events he made personal comments which was a mistake. 

[...] We don’t quarrel with his right to have any personal point of view, although we do assert as a company that we have a tolerant point of view, we are a diverse company, and that does not represent what our company thinks.”

Yes, of course. Fully tolerant. Of everybody who agrees with them. Got it.

Gone Golfin'....

The National GC, Talamore GC. Southern Pines, NC.

Here's a video re-cap of our 2010 event. Sadly, we had to "limp" to just 12 guys this year. I want it back at a full 24 next year.

So if this looks fun to you, hit me up early on in 2014. We could always use some new blood!

Snicky du Jour: Nicole Curtis

So I'm watching HGTV or DIY or one of those idiotic "home improvement" channels, and I come across this gal. Okay, kinda snicky. But wait, whoa. She can actually swing a hammer! Re-wire electrical. Lay down some hardwood floors.

She actually seems to WORK HER ASS OFF re-habbing homes. Respect.

Granted, she would probably have no time to deal with your dumb ass - nor cook dinnner for you - after a long day stripping down lead paint on a 1920's Victorian.

But, she could certainly replace her own lightbulbs. And then some. I think she's kinda hot, in a handygirl kinda way.