Wednesday, May 26, 2010

To All Of Our Troops, We Apologize For Peter King

Peter King continues his reign of total insipidity.

Thankfully, the boys at Kissing Suzy Kolber keep crushing him out of the park. Before I get to the guts of this week's entry, let me cut to the chase.

Memorial Day is this weekend. While we are all galloping around like fools eating hot dogs and throwing frisbees, it is our responsibility to remember the men and women who helped secure our freedom to do this kind of stuff.

For Peter King, it might be a good weekend to google up the wikipedia page on our most sacred burial place for these men: Arlington National Cemetery.

Writes King:

On a visit to Washington to tend to some USO matters last Wednesday, my wife and I visited Arlington National Cemetery for the first time.

In the midst of watching the changing of the guard at the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier, we heard distant rumbles, like thunderclaps. Those were no thunderclaps. They were rifle volleys, fired at the interment of a former service member. I didn’t realize how active a cemetery Arlington still is.

REACT: You freaking dope.

Some people think King writes in a way that purposefully paints himself as an innocent, full of observational wonder.

That instead of just saying: "Arlington Cemetery is still, sadly, a very active one. Men and women from our wars in Afghanistan and Iraq are buried there on a weekly basis" King writes idiotic stuff like the above.

I don't buy it. I really think he's a moron.

I mean, he also writes "Washington has to be the best walking city in America."

Snaps KSK: "Dude, the Lincoln Memorial is ninety miles from any goddamn Metro stop. Its staircase is littered with the corpses of old people who died from heat stroke."

Washington was laid out by a Frenchman on crack, Pierre Charles L'Enfant. It is full of long diagonal streets and traffic circles. You can't walk from the best nightlife part of town, Georgetown, to the monuments. The subway doesn't even connect that. Aside from walking the mall, you can't get ANYWHERE you want to be by foot. Especially sports. Other than the Verizon Center, you are screwed by foot.

Pete King is an idiot. To think Chicago or New York can't beat Washington as a "walking city" is absurd.

Well, enough of me. Please see the KSK treatment of King's latest column, which includes an overly gullible assessment of what the Bears offense will look like this year under new OC Mike Martz.

(Spoiler alert: King actually uses the phrase: "If Cutler doesn't throw alot of picks...")

And I remind people: This clown gets to help decide who should be in the Pro Football Hall of Fame.


  1. Since there is nothing to listen to in the morning on my xm/best of sirius satellite radio (fsr sucks donkey now) i flip it over to nfl sirius radio. Peter King is on there and i actually listen to this tool sing the bumper music, and then usually spew totally uniformed nonsense until i feel the blood from my ears streaming down my neck. Yeah, it's that painful.
    P.S. God Bless Our Troops!

  2. From the USO Website..."We are humbled by these donations and grateful to King for bringing attention to such a great program. King promises to continue to update his readership on Sgt. McGuire and his men, and had this quote to share in yesterday’s column: “I don’t even know what to say,” [McGuire] wrote from Germany, where his 135-troop Havoc Company, 40th Engineers, is training for deployment in Afghanistan later this year. “I am speechless, really. We are just soldiers. Never expected anything like this. Please tell everyone, ‘Thank you.’ I wish I could describe the emotions better. This just proves that the American people have not forgotten about the soldier. WOW!!!”"

    Yeah - So he's a freaking dope for visiting Arlington while here supporting the USO and Wounded Warriors. You on the other hand are a putz and just lost a member (permanently) of this POS site.

  3. Little known fact: "rmshield" is Peter King's blogger commenting handle.