Monday, December 9, 2013

Best NFL Sunday... Ever!

It can't even be close. There's only one problem: nobody has been keeping a very good, detailed list, soooo I'm not sure what would be #2.

But my goodness, Sunday was so incredible, it reminded me of two immutable truths...

NFL football is so awesome a televised sporting product, that because the games are almost always down to the last second, and the utterly bizarre ways to win or lose are so myriad...

1. You can't f*** it up. Even though NFL owners seem to be trying real hard. (Hint: they can't).
2. As a frequent critic of everything involved with "Point #1" above.... well... whatever. I can't quit it. And neither can you. Sign me up for 10 more years of Sunday Ticket. Price is no object.

Then, you throw in some snow. All over the bleeping place!

Had to be the SNOWIEST Sunday in league history, and I am pretty sure somebody at ESPN's "Nerd Factory" is going to research that and have our answer by mid-week.

Thanks Al Gore!

- Amazing Finishes
- Horrible Calls on simple rules we accept
- Random application of horrible rules everybody hates
- Off-field soap operas
- Big hits
- Rivalries
- Fantasy
- Gambling
- Cover5
- Elimation Pools

And best of all, Ed Hochuli asking.... nay... DEMANDING... that somebody get out here right now and blow the goal-line!

Ahem. Well, he *sorta* said that.

NFL records fell on Sunday all over the place...

LeSean McCoy broke Steve Van Buren's single game rush record with the Eagles set in 1949.
Matt Prater finally took down Tom Dempsy's 63 yard field goal mark. And altitude be damned, it was f***ing freezing in Denver, so I think there's no asterisks to be hung on it.

And surely the DEPTH of the snow in Philly (almost 8 inches) is the deepest I've ever seen for an NFL game.

Obviously, the league would love something sorta like the Philly game in New York for the Superbowl. But they might get just frostbite and wind. Or numbing rain.

We shall see...


Things here in Washington D.C. are about to get nutty. I don't really have any great desire to adjudicate this 3-way idiot's-spat between Danny, Shanny, and SuperBob. But, alas, this is the job.

So, yeah. Who leaked the Shanahan "office cleanout" story, almost a full YEAR after the fact? Gee, take a guess? Who wants to get fired - right now, to get a jump on other vacancies - while pinning his own abysmal record on a meddling owner and a diva QB?

Any guesses?

Shanny is a beady-eyed, excuse-making weasel, and his true colors, in full plumage, are being shown now. He's done here, and he's done league-wide. Mark my words. The best paragraph came from this awesome nuclear blast of a column from veteran Skins opinion man Tom Boswell in the Washington Post.
In the Great Snyder Depression, there have been many low points. He fired Schottenheimer in part because he just didn’t like him, even though he’d won eight of his last 11 games. Then he hired Spurrier, who lasted only two years, then phoned in his resignation from a golf course. Some thought that the bottom was when the only human Snyder and his pet general manager, Vinny Cerrato, could get as head coach was a position coach, Zorn, who thought the teams colors were maroon and black. 
But none of that, apparently, was the true and absolute bottom. Out-of-work Kremlinologists who now study Ashburn, Va., will someday determine whether Shanahan really wants to be fired so he can get the first shot at the open Houston coaching job and take his son, Kyle, a successful offensive coordinator there in ’09-10, with him to a safe harbor and, perhaps, a No. 1 overall draft pick. After all, the Texans are the only team in the NFL with a worse record than Washington. Or maybe “fired” ensures him more of the $7 million for ’14 that he’s owed, whereas “I quit” squanders it.
Ka-boom. Read the whole thing. It's museum quality. Boz had the stones to ask Shanny: "So, you're only going to answer questions about things you want to talk about today, is that it?"

Of course, I hesitate to piledrive Shanny too much, because as Bos mentions above - IT ALWAYS ENDS BADLY WITH DANNY COACHES! Except Gibbs, who left suddenly and was of no help at all in finding a decent successor.

All I know, is LOOK at that graphic ESPN worked up for the story. Could they make Danny or Shanny look like any bigger shitheels? Good work, graphics department.


You watch enough football, and you start to see patterns. The way Cleveland lost was typical. Up by a "safe" 12 points vs. the Pats with just over 2:00 to play, the Browns decided to ONLY rush 4 players against one of the most lethal QB's in history. Brady had plenty of time to scan and throw, and went tic-tac-toe down the field almost exclusively to Julian Edelman for a TD to close the gap to 5.

After the on-side kick (the first one the Pats had recovered since 1995!) you would think the Browns would learn their lesson and at least rush 5. Wrong. On the controversial PI call that set-up 1st and goal, look at the comical fact that the Browns STILL had three warm bodies trying to cover a no-name scrub like Josh Boyce.

To no avail. Surely smart d-coordinators would look at that and say "you know, if we just rushed one more guy" this dude would still not be any more "covered" than with three DBs.

The same thing happened in the Vikings-Ravens game, where you can see here the comical MIS-APPLICATION of bodies to defend a game winning pass with :10 left.

It's like coaching DOGMA, that "thou shalt NEVER rush more than 4 guys" to make sure you have all the empty field covered with bodies.

Flacco on that play dropped back comfortably, looked at his options comfortably, and then thre the game winning dagger.... comfortably.

And I suspect this nonsense will continue. Most NFL coaches are creatures of habit, superstition and fear.

Not logic.


  1. Shanahan asked for it and Boswell simply obliged that beet-faced success vampire. I *never* listen to Shanny's post-game press conferences, relying on you and your crew to give me the highlights (lowlights?) on Monday mornings. Yesterday, I simply could not resist after all that had gone down in the 5-6 hours prior. I just knew when I heard Boswell's "question" (which in and of itself was of supreme testicular fortitude) and Shanny's answer that Boz was going to destroy him and the columnist did not disappoint--one for the ages indeed. If The Shanahans make it through today, I will be extremely surprised.

  2. The following is submitted in defense of Shanny:

    · From day one they have looked like a professional team for the first time in the Snyder era

    · When Fat Albert was doing his thing Shanny applied discipline like a coach should. He’d sit and then move on with practice.

    · McNabb was a bust, but it was set up in such a way that it only lasted one season. How many years was the Brunell experience?????

    Now we find out he got thoroughly fed up with the owners meddling and was ready to quit. That would also explain why they look so inept this year. If the coach has had it, the team us sure to pick up on it. The dude’s far from perfect but the real culprit here is pretty obvious.

  3. Were you like me and were disappointed when there was no snow in Cincy and England. Snow + Football (or hockey) AWESOME!. (fyi did u notice how much better the ravens field looked than the Redskins field?)