We Are Who We Thought We Weren't

I returned to Washington, D.C. in the fall of 1999, and began full time on The Sports Reporters with Andy Pollin in the spring of 2000. That was when the first great Snyder splurge began. Bruce Smith, Jeff George, Deion and on and on. We know how that went.

There's been 3 playoff games in those 11 years. One inTampa (a lucky win with 116 yards of total offense), and two in Seattle (both losses). No division titles. We've had 7 head coaches, which is more than a new one every 2 years on average.

Kinda like your cellphone.

We've had a smattering of good home grown players, but nobody remotely worthy of being put on the Cover of SI, or the Cover of Madden. Nobody really relevant in the national scheme. Nobody really, really good...

And we've had flops.. disasters... debacles... Archuleta, Lloyd, Duckett, Taylor, Haynesworth... et al....

Andy and I have sat here on the radio and howled at the moon, we've brayed at the stupefying incompetence of it all. We've pounded our fists in cathartic anger....

And here we are, 23 games into the Shanahan era, and nothing has changed.

Nothing.

We are.... who we thought we were... a dysfunctional... dispiritied... and without a coherent path to respectability... team.

Be patient, they say. Okay.
He's a good coach, they say. Okay.

Once he finds HIS quarterback, we'll be on our way, they say.

Ohhhhkay.

But are we wrong to expect something more, in the meantime. Some fiestyness? Some innovation? Something bold, something new, something out of the box?

Something other than "he won 2 Super Bowls, so you shut up and sit down."

Preparing for my usual Monday re-cap of the game, and a balancing of micro issues (week to week, plays, players, and game situations) vs. the macro issues (roster, talent, scheme, coaching staff) I was contemplating a fire breathing, name naming, finger pointing, let's fire this guy, and that guy... and ol' what's his name... RANT....

Yet I managed to stop to myself to ask..... why... WHY... do I bother?

It hasn't worked for 11 years, why would it work now?

Something is wrong. Very, very, very... WRONG.. out there at 21300 Redskins Park Drive.

I fear, it's either a curse, or the culture.... and I'm not sure which one is easier to fix.

There's no pulse... there's no heartbeat... there's no... "there"... there.... right now, and I don't get it.

The injuries are not an excuse...

The talent is not... an excuse...

The lockout is not an excuse...

Even the QB.s... are not an excuse...

The Miami Dolphins came off a gut-punch, pie-in-the-face loss at home to Tim Tebow... and delivered a helluva fight against the Giants.

The St. Louis Rams shrugged off a world class whomping by the Cowboys, and used a backup QB to fully humiliate a Saints team coming off a 62 point game.

Don't tell me.... there's not enough talent here. There is. Do something with it.

You have exactly 2 more games to right the season. Two. Home against a somewhat overachieving 49ers team. Then away at the putrid Dolphins.

Win one. I'll still care. Barely.

Lose 'em both.. and go eff yourself.

I Declare These.... Awesome

Happy Halloween!

Craction Pool Week 8

Even though the Packers are on a BYE this week, you are playing for this RARE and AWESOME Donald Driver collectible McFarlane action figure. Right from my own shelf!

All you gotta do, is dial in the PERFECT Craction.com 4-way combination!

Sign up HERE, for free, and enjoy the game!

HALL of CHAMPIONS
Week 1: Shawn Brandt
Week 2: Larry Haslee/Ronnie Windsor
Week 3: Eric Hucke
Week 4: John Merrill
Week 5: John Sample
Week 6: Nate Faust
Week 7: John Heibel

Week 8: MAYBE You!....

Personally, I'm going to roll with Jimmy Masterlock's Picks, this week, because he IS a staggering 18-9-1!

Jimmy Sez:

New Orleans -14 at St. Louis
Washington +6 at Toronto Bills
Houston -10 vs. Jacksonville
New England -3 at Pittsburgh

Nothing Like A 999-1 Bet at $250 On the Brink of Coming Home To Focus The Mind

If THIS GUY (/cue Gruden voice) doesn't "hedge off" some of this payday with heavy action on the Rangers, then he's got "balls the size of church bells" (/cue Dabney Coleman in Dragnet).

Jim Haslett Was Not Exactly a "Hot" Coaching Property

Okay, this is a relatively petty argument, but one that has been bugging me for some time. It goes something like this.

When talking about the Redskins "staff" under Mike Shanahan, I have been less than enthralled with the resumes and caliber of the OC and DC. As I casually mentioned to my colleague and afternoon co-host on ESPN980, Andy Pollin, "well, we have a UFL coach and the head coach's kid for our coordinators. Not exactly a Hall of Fame tandem."

Andy can't take exception to the "coaches kid" jab, because, well, it's true.

The Jim Haslett moniker of "UFL coach" however, really rankles him - for some reason.

The point I was trying to make, and somehow keep failing with Andy, is that Haslett, once let go by the Rams as interim HC, was basically at the end of his coaching career. Which, while sad for him, is a reality for many coaches who "have their run" in the highest league in the land.

Not wanted by any other NFL team as a coordinator, Haslett had to accept the lowly gig in the fledgling UFL. When I point this out, Andy gets very pointed and defensive, saying "how do you know he didn't have offers to be a coordinator elsewhere in the NFL? Maybe he wanted to be a head coach again, and CHOSE the UFL instead."

Child, please.

I tried to impress upon Andy that the NFL, is, well, the NATIONAL....FOOTBALL..... LEAGUE..., and being a coordinator in that league is pretty damn good. Or, as Larry David would say, "pretty... pretty... good."

Only a blithering IDIOT, would turn down a DC job in the NFL, to take  HC job in the UFL for surely half the price, and with absolutely zero stability (see: league, folded).

Andy, however, rises with indignance when I say that, and fires back.... "and you KNOW this... BECAUSE...???"

Well, here's the show stopper, at least in my mind. From the Orlando Sentinel, by way of courtesy of e-mailer Jeremy Floam...

He became the St. Louis Rams defensive coordinator in 2006 and stayed there until last year. He took over as interim head coach when head coach Scott Lenihan was fired after Game 4. 

Haslett led the Rams to two straight wins, but then the team lost the final 10 games and Haslett was not asked to return. 

He was out of football and didn't know what to do with himself. "I was probably driving my family crazy. You go 16 years of waking up a four in the morning every day and working until 11 at night and then suddenly, you're doing nothing." 

He was considering the defensive coordinator job with Green Bay, also had another couple of opportunities with other teams as an assistant head coach, but nothing quite worked out. He was indeed, jobless. Until the UFL came along. "I figured, what the hell ... why not?"

Boom. Roasted.

"What the hell, why not?"
-Jim Haslett

Back to you, Andy.....

Thoughts on Optics, Replay, and Romanticism

Okay, so here it is. That's a touchdown in my book, by my eyes, every day that ends in a "y".

That didn't prevent, however, many of you (no doubt) Wisconsin fans from plaintively whining and begging for it to be otherwise. The common refrains I saw on Twitter were.... among others...

"It wasn't conclusive enough to overturn the call on the field!"
"You can't see the ball clearly!"
"Those camera angles are right on the goal line!"

Of course the camera angle isn't dead 90 degrees square, but that doesn't matter. As long as you draw the goal line at the same angle as it appears, then everything else is relative. It would only matter, if you DID draw a 90 degree line and say "see, the ball is outside!"

In this shot (and others) the play is a touchdown whether you apply the "least generous" portion of the goal line as it appears (the lower, nearest part) or the most generous (the upper, by the pylon). In fact, if the football were actually #53's shoulder #53, then it is STILL a touchdown, because only the prickly point of the football need scratch the front (leading) edge of the 6" painted white goal line.

But whatever. I can't be 1000% certain (because there is no such thing as 1000%) that brown blob is ACTUALLY the football, and not something else, but for the sake of getting the call right, I can accept that brown blob as "the ball."

The larger complaint seemed to center on the phraseology that overturned calls must have "conclusive" or "indisputable" evidence to the call on the field.

This wording has always been problematic in replay, college or pro. Here's why.

1. There is virtually nothing in the universe that is "indisputable." People dispute some of the most obvious and widely accepted things. (e.g. Chris Berman is a talentless ape).

2. The premise that the instant call on the field, made in real time, by officials who may, or may not, be in correct position deserves primacy over the subsequent replay determination.

This is absurd.

What the wording of the replay rule SHOULD read, is as follows. "The play on the field shall stand, if the video evidence is of no assistance in clarifying the call."

A video replay, of a ball completely obscured by bodies, is of no assistance and as such, you must revert to the call on the field. But nowadays, with HD and multiple angles, this is almost never the case.

When there is video evidence of a call, it is ALWAYS more accurate and reliable than a call on the field.

Always.

How? Because the human eye cannot freeze frame a single moment at 1/30th of a second and gaze at that frame for as long as it likes. The human brain cannot synthesize 3 different camera angles of a play in real time, and make that call within 5 seconds of the play ending.

Video replays are (almost) always more accurate than calls on the field in the same way that an x-ray is more accurate than a doctor just feeling your innards with his hands.

What some fans are really saying when they plead that this play lacked "sufficient" evidence to overturn a call on the field, is that they want the more "romanticized" notion of officiating to decide such a taut, highly entertaining football game.

The "old school" notion of "quick, was he in or out" referee call that we all grew up with.

Those calls were often wrong, but alas, never in doubt. They were made and you just had to live with the injustice. To some, I'm sure, this application of scientific, forensic officiating "justice" just didn't seem right. Too clinical. Too technical.

Yes, to the naked eye, the play looked like a "not-quite" touchdown. In the old days, it would have stood as such. And in crummy 480p standard definition, with only 1 reliable camera angle, it might not have even looked like a TD upon the dreaded "further review."

But not in 2011, with HD cameras all over the place. He's in. You can't drink him back to the 1 yard line, Badger fans, even though you are welcome to try.

I would be fine with going back to the more "romantic" method of officiating. I think replay still gets plenty of stuff wrong (Jerome Boger missed a no-brainer of an incomplete pass in my Redskins game, even after staring at it in the booth) and the time it takes is just sucking... the... life... out... of... games.

Replay can't be used on some of the most egregious calls that change games (pass interference, holding) and as such it doesn't really deliver a perfectly officiated game.

I think it moves the needle from 98% accurate, to 99% accurate and that's just not worth it, in my mind.

Finally, there's a real sticky situation that hasn't happened yet, but may some day soon. Say this play had been ruled a TD, and yet the video showed clearly that MSU's player was stopped short. Let's also say it would have ENDED the game, and not just sent it to overtime.

Well, then. What referee has the stones to take that score off the board, duck the debris from the natives on the way to the tunnel, and hope not to star in a real life version of the Allstate Insurance mayhem series "fleeing referee" commercial?

You would hope, every ref would. But I can't be so sure.

Craction Pool Week 7

This week we're playing for the "Old School" Fightin' Donkeys helmet (circa 1962!) and all you have to do is sign up for Czabe's Craction.com league, right here, it's free baby!

HALL of CHAMPIONS
Week 1: Shawn Brandt
Week 2: Larry Haslee/Ronnie Windsor
Week 3: Eric Hucke
Week 4: John Merrill
Week 5: John Sample
Week 6: Nate Faust
Week 7: Maybe.... YOU!

Personally, I'm going to roll with Jimmy Masterlock's Picks, this week, because he IS a staggering 15-8-1!

Jimmy Sez:

Carolina +3 vs. Washington

Arizona +4 vs. Pittsburgh

Denver +2 at Miami

Dallas -13 vs. St. Louis

Jimmy's Long Lost Mentor

If you ever wondered where the inspiration came from, well then, wonder no more....

Chalk One Up For My Ol' Team!

As they say.... "Saxon Golf /insert high voice/... championship."

Once upon a time, I was senior captain of the mightly Langley links-ers. It was 1986. We did not win state. In fact, we didn't even make it to state, as a team.

Yours truly, shot 79-80 over two days at Algonkian Regional Park GC to land in a two-for-one spot playoff for an individual spot in the state championships at the Regional Finals.

I missed a 10 foot par putt that would have won it on the first hole. Then bogeyed the second hole to end my high school golf career.

These young punks, are way better than I ever was. I am very proud of them. Sasparilla's on the Czabe, guys!

Shut The Front Door!

Three words: Albino. Cyclops. Shark.

Holy f***.

A fisherman has discovered what appears to be an albino cyclops shark with a single eye in the centre of its face - and scientists say it’s real. The cyclops fetus was cut from the belly of a pregnant bull shark caught in the Gulf of California. Shark researchers who have examined the creature say it is genuine and not a fake - although it is unlikely it would have survived the birth.

And the Raiders traded a 1st and 2nd rounder to the Bengals for Carson Palmer at the trade deadline.

You can flip a coin as to which story leaves you - as Clark Griswold would say - "more surprised than if I woke up with my head sewed to the carpet."

Jim Hard-paw

Hip-Hip Hooray, For Useless Idiots

This one nails it out of the (Zuccoti) park....

They’re used to ranting vaguely about “the system” and “the man,” but now people want more specifics, and it confuses them. 

They thought complaining about the “greed” of “Wall Street bankers” was more specific than they usually are. Maybe that doesn’t really sync with their desire for student-loan forgiveness (as loaning $100,000 to people allergic to work isn’t so much “greed” as plain stupidity), but no one seemed to care about coherency before. 

That’s why they get so indignant when people ask what their demands are -- figuring out what they want is other people’s job; they always just made noise. A hippie protesting is like a baby crying: It doesn’t know what needs to be done -- or often even exactly what the problem is -- it just knows something is wrong, so it makes noise until an adult comes and fixes things. But when people already know something is wrong and are trying to fix things, the baby crying is nothing more than headache-inducing. 

That’s the dilemma for hippies. They have no place when people must deal with real problems. You don’t see hippies in war-torn Third World countries; useless idiots are a luxury.

As Michael Scott would say: "Boom. Roasted."

"Good Game, Coach"

Since it is one of those "must have" opinions in sports today, and this week, let me just get my take on the table and for the record.

1. Jim Harbaugh was wrong.
2. Jim Harbaugh ran like a girl when it was clear Schwartz had something to say.
3. Schwartz's reputation as a "class act" is not exactly rock solid either.
4. The NFL should fine both coaches a small amount (5k) and be done.
5. Coaches should be allowed to say "I shake hands before the game, not after."

Okay, that's where I stand. Now, something else from the incident that is worth bringing to light. Mike Pereira points out that Harbaugh might well have been aware of Schwartz clowning him during the game from his own sideline. 

As he was being tackled by Patrick Willis, Willis stripped the ball out of Pettigrew’s hands, but Pettigrew was already down. Harbaugh tried to challenge the ruling, but was penalized for unsportsmanlike conduct.

While replay did its job on this play, confirming the ruling, Harbaugh attempted to challenge the ruling on the field and was hit with the penalty. Coaches are not allowed to challenge inside of two minutes if they are out of challenges, if they are out of timeouts or if a play is ruled a score.

Harbaugh deserved the penalty, but didn’t deserve the verbal abuse that came from the Lions coach on the other sideline. Schwartz was seen on television mocking Harbaugh by yelling something like, "Know the rules," except with a little off-color language thrown in.

Although Harbaugh denied seeing it, it makes me wonder whether the ill will didn’t start right there. Because with as many television cameras that cover the NFL these days, everybody sees everything. And I’m sure someone must have told him.What's funny, is that a more seasoned coach with a real resume, could pull out the ol' "well, this ain't college, Jimmy Rah Rah" angle on Harbaugh. But who the hell is Jim Schwartz? A nobody, really. So he has no standing or stature to pull that off.

For me, I am fascinated at the undeclared, yet undeniable importance of a post-game ritual that lasts - at best! - 2 seconds. Look at the end of an NFL game, and you'll see a gaggle of vested photographers converge to document the handshake. TV networks will purposely slow walk the ending of their telecast, just to make sure they get the "handshake" on TV.

Hell, it's not the Yalta Conference. It's a handshake!

Bottom line is this: it shouldn't be so hard for coaches, competitive or "fiery" as they may be, to share a respectful game concluding handshake with each other and then part ways.

What Harbaugh did would have been unacceptable in any situation. He's lucky it took Schwartz a second to realize Jimmy College was being a total jackass, and intentionally showing him up. He's also lucky he didn't get dotted in the eye.

It doesn't make Schwartz right. He can be a jumpy jackass of his own. But Harbaugh is going to be a targeted man by the rest of the league from here on out.

Craction Pool Week 6

Craction Pool Time!

This week, we've got a slammin', vintage, hard to find Fighting Donkeys mini-helmet, autographed by ME, if you want it. Or clean, if you don't!

All yours, if you just nail the Craction Code for the week in the NFL!

SIGN UP HERE FOR CZABE'S LEAGUE!

Meanwhile, our winner last week was

HALL of CHAMPIONS
Week 1: Shawn Brandt
Week 2: Larry Haslee/Ronnie Windsor
Week 3: Eric Hucke
Week 4: John Merrill
Week 5: Maybe.... YOU!

Kenyon Martin Knows How To Win Friends and Influence People

This, from Adrian Wojnarowski's excellent piece on the current NBA labor standoff....

Sometimes, the players union makes it so easy for the NBA. Before the talks fell apart without a deal on Monday, Players Association president Derek Fisher had an idea: Let’s flood people’s Twitter timelines with pointless catch phrases and hashtags, a plan born from the NFLPA and “The Bad News Bears in Breaking Training.” “Let us play,” Fisher told the players to post, forgetting that the public’s response – besides un-following his Twitter account out of sheer annoyance – was to tell the players to simply take the deal the owners were offering. 

This wasn’t an idea out of the union’s smartest PR mind, Dan Wasserman, but one of the consulting pockets of the Players Association that do nothing but waste the players’ dues. 

Before you know it, there was Kenyon Martin calling for his “haters” to die of “full-blown AIDS,” and inviting everyone else giving him a hard time on Twitter to send along a home address, so he could come to your house and “kick your ass.” 

Martin isn’t the norm, but he’s who many people want to believe populate this NBA. And why give them the chance on Monday, when the players could’ve let Stern have the bad-guy stage all to himself? 

For better or worse, NBA players will never win public sympathy. They have every right to this labor fight, but it is their fight and their fight alone. It isn’t shared with the fans, the arena workers, no one. The sooner they understand that, the easier this will go for them. Forget the PR fight – just win the fight.

REACT: The problem isn't so much that fans think the league is FULL of people like Kenyon Martin. We don't. Give us some credit. The problem is that Kenyon Martin does exist. Having one of him, is enough. And he made $16 million last year to play 48 games and post 8 points per game.

Stupid owners? Sure. They gave him that money. I get it.

But most reasonable fans think owners should be able to wake up one day and simply say: "I am getting out of the Kenyon Martin business" and do just that. Be done with him.

If Kenyon Martin is not that bad of a guy, and still a valuable asset to a team, then surely another club will quickly pounce on that owner's "mistake" of letting him go.

If I were the NBA owners, I would tell the players this: "Either give up guaranteed contracts, or accept a franchise tag. Your choice." The money split isn't really the issue. Let them keep 57% even. Just let it be known, that without a guaranteed deal in place, your $16 million salary - can, and will - be re-directed to another player next season.

So try to be coachable, and please don't tell fans whom you disagree with to "die of full blown AIDS."

Pretty Good Traj on That Tiger Weiner Toss

Too bad Tiger didn't step back, and say loudly to the idiot: "Oh, sorry dude. I didn't know that was your wife." And it's a good thing Stevie "The Violent Bag Ape" Williams wasn't still on the bag, because Stevie would have pulled one of the officers guns from his holster, shoved it down the guy's throat gangster style, and made him wet his pants muttering an apology through a polished steel gun barrel.

"I Should Have Married John Clark"

There's a commercial running right now for AT&T, that I wonder how it made it through a conference room of creative writers without getting shot down for being utterly stupid, and offensive to at least 50% of it's intended audience.

The commercial, is the one where the whipped husband, sheepishly tells his disapproving wife, he's added unlimited text messaging to their cell phone plan. She then summons the steeds of bitchiness and contempt, to belittle this guy for wasting such household money without discussing it with her first.

Does anybody notice, this cranky yenta is busy watering her precious hothouse flowers?

I would venture to say, if you own a home with a greenhouse, you are not strapped for cash for extra cell phone minutes. Unless she's working at a local nursery, and this poor sap just came by to update the missus on the cell plan, and let her take a free swinging kick at his manhood in the process. (Doubtful).

Assuming many men DO control the cell phone plan at home, how exactly is this commercial going to make them feel like calling AT&T and getting a piece of that? So, whatever. Another commercial where men are made out as spineless, stupid, helpless saps without their better halves.

I suppose there are an equal number of commercials that freely clown women with the same degree of condescension. But maybe not. Do me a favor folks, and remind me of what those commercials are.

Rest In Peace, Al Davis

And meet the (perhaps) new boss, his son Mark?

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

And now... not for the timid, some of my favorite Al Davis photos of recent vintage...

Craction Pool Week 5

Craction Pool Time!

And who wouldn't want this lovely AUTOGRAPHED Bob & Brian (and Czabe!) bowling pin from the 2009 Gutter Bowl!

All yours, if you just nail the Craction Code for the week in the NFL!

SIGN UP HERE FOR CZABE'S LEAGUE!

Meanwhile, our winner last week was John Merrill!

HALL of CHAMPIONS
Week 1: Shawn Brandt
Week 2: Larry Haslee/Ronnie Windsor
Week 3: Eric Hucke
Week 4: John Merrill
Week 5: Maybe.... YOU!

ESPN The Body Issue

I know she's not everybody's "thing" but I'm a hopeless, Hope Solo fanatic.

Mmmm. Muscles.

More.. here.

Web Videos Are Capable of Fooling Many, Many, People

Okay, please stop sending me this clip, people.

I mean, really. Obviously FAKED sports tricks, are great fun, if like, I dunno, you just got on the internet for the first time in your life, um, YESTERDAY!

Unlike video montages of drunken college kids in their dorm, chipping golf balls off of every piece of furniture and into a shotglass of beer, at least those kids filmed about 1000 failed attempts before getting the real trick on tape.



Or same thing for guys shooting basketballs off of towers into a tiny hoop hundreds of feet below. Enough takes, and a snip-snip editing job, and wow, YouTube sensation!



Think about this, dummies. How does a ball bouncing off of FOUR pitchbacks, MAINTAIN its relative velocity all the way back to the plate? Did you people really flunk physics in high school?

Or how about the realistic chances you could even THROW a baseball at just the precise angle that many times in a row, much less HIT one with a round bat?

Sigh.

But the link keeps washing up in my inbox, with titles like "Amazing! Watch this, Czabe!"

No. I'm not going to watch it. You need to stop being such a sucker.

Should The NFL Give Pink, The Pink Slip?

Okay, I'm not "harping" on this issue, because I really don't care. If the NFL feels the Breast Cancer Awareness campaign is good, valuable, and worth doing, then good on them.

For the record, I am firmly against ALL cancer, including breast. Ladies, keep a keen eye on those precious orbs, get your checkups, and godspeed.

(PS: Is it okay for us men to keep one little eye on them, in the meantime? No?)

That said... here's an interesting story about how the whole campaign might actually be backfiring, like an Andy Reid gameplan.

But Professor Stefan Puntoni, an associate professor of marketing at the Rotterdam School of Management, has a study that shows that pink is not only not ideal, it could be detrimental to breast cancer fundraising.

Puntoni hypothesizes that since pink is targeted directly to them, women act defensive. When they feel less threatened and are not spoken to directly through copy or through pink color cues, Puntoni found that they were more likely to donate to a women-related charity (in his study, ovarian cancer).

"If more research shows that a change of color is desirable then we should move away from pink," Puntoni said. "If pink alone is not causing denial, then we can keep pink but just be aware of how it should be used to avoid the campaign backfiring."
While slogans like "Think Pink" have been thought of as success, Puntoni is quick to point out that "it's not about what women willingly want or don't want to think about.

The effects documented in our paper are automatic and non-conscious. People are not aware of them. In fact, a good way to kill the effect is to make women explicitly think about their fear of breast cancer."

The story explains that Commissioner Goodell's mother died of breast cancer, which sheds more light on the league's relationship to the cause. Many men have said "hey, where's the brown ribbon for prostate cancer, which is equally common for men, as breast cancer is for women?"

Come on, fellas. We don't need a ribbon, do we? If you don't know that your prostate is basically pre-determined to go cancerous the older you get, then you never cracked the body's manual. Plus, the survival rate for prostate cancer is like, 99%!

Breast cancer is pretty beatable too, at about 89% depending upon the table you consult.

Thankfully, almost ALL cancers have moved the needle significantly on survival rates since the 1960's thanks to modern medicine, research, and of course, money.

Unfortunately, two people who meant a lot to me, died of cancers with far less optimistic outcomes. Tony Snow, the former Fox News anchor, turned White House spokesman, died in July of 2008 of colon cancer. That nasty form has only a 64% 5-year survival rate. Tony was a big fan of my show, and extended invites to appear on his Saturday afternoon show on Fox for any sports related news story that rose to national headlines.

And the man who hired me nationally for Fox Sports Radio, Andrew Ashwood died just 2 months after that, after a gutsy but brutal battle with the the mother****** of all cancers, pancreatic cancer. That cancer has a 4% survival rate. He fought it with both fists for about a year, losing 100 pounds along the way. He was 51.

It sucks. It all sucks. And if the NFL decides this massive push for breast cancer is worth it, that's on them. It doesn't cost me a thing, and I do believe proceeds go to the American Cancer Society, not some individual account for breast cancer alone.

I do really hate the pink, though. If only because I am a uniform geek, that likes clean coherent colors and logos. How about this for an alternate way to raise money. Every week in October, fans can donate money for the cause, and specify WHICH COACH you would like to see decked out in full PINK, from head to toe.

Coach with the most money attached to his name, wins. Er, loses.

Andy Reid, as a giant pink ball of game-botching cotton candy?

I've got my checkbook ready. 

Does It Get Any Better Than This?

Um, no. So you better drink it up, greedily, Cheeseheads.

It Comes WIth A Hat

I'm a little late on this, but the point is truly timeless.

Remember 9/11 weekend, and various teams/coaches/players wanting to wear something special to commemorate/honor/remember the victims/heroes/responders to that horrible day?

Well, sports were all over the place on that one.

The NFL had handpicked games in cities like NY and Washington, they had various tributes, they even relented on letting players wear special red-white-and-blue gloves and shoes.

Okay, fine.

But when MLB players wanted to do some customization on the headwear and such, the league said, um, no.

And some people, went predictably batty with indignance. How DARE they!

It was a stupid argument. Because MLB saying no to letting the Mets wear FDNY hats during a game didn't mean anything. It is why there's a term called a "shirtsleeve sentiment."

Ohhh. You wore a HAT! Oh, you care MORE than the other guy who didn't wear a hat/ribbon/patch.

Get outta here.

It's like the Capital One commercial with Alec Baldwin, when he tells a new enrollee "Did you know it comes with a private island?"

"It does?"

"No, it comes with a HAT."

Same thing.

"It means I care."

No, it means you are wearing a hat.