Thursday, April 23, 2009

Meet The Redneck Bernie Madoff In Cleats

Ever wonder what it would be like to take the psychotic arrogance of Donald Trump, the fiscal irresponsibility of Michael Vick, and the scammer's hustle of Bernie Madoff - then cram it all into a giant blender and hit "puree"?

If you did, you'd have Lenny Dykstra.

Here, let me tell you what you are going to do for lunch today. You are going to click here on this Mike Fish article on Dykstra's house of financial cards as it teeters on collapse. You are going to hit "print."

Then you are going to sit down and order your soup and sandwich, start reading a nearly 8,000 word opus to the biggest shitbag ex-athlete you've ever seen who is not currently in jail, and wonder aloud: "How did this redneck douchebag ever make enough money to start ripping people off for millions in the first place?"

Best of all, my Milwaukee Brewer friends! He has a son, "Cutter" who is currently in the minors.

In Wisconsin!

Good times, good times. If he ever makes the big club and starts making some real money, you can expect the father-son relationship to be so chilly, that it will make the Fielder Family Reunions seem like an episode of The Waltons.

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