Monday, September 5, 2011

The Teenage Rocket Sled to Trouble



And what this sweet little freckle-faced, braces wearing faux-picture of teenage innocence did NOT mention as side benefits of giving your kid a cell phone....

- You can then start calling your new teenage boyfriend at any time, from anywhere, without your parents knowing anything about it.
- You can discuss when and where to lose your virginity together.
- You can text him naked pictures of yourself that will be used later for internet humiliation, retaliation, blackmail, and perhaps lead to suicide.
- You can become a self-absorbed Facebook generation dope, with little intellectual curiosity or awareness outside your social media "bubble."
- You now have a phone number where internet predators can reach you directly, at any time.
- You can text while driving, and possibly kill yourself and your friends.

Oh.. the benefits are endless. But remember: "young love" can never blossom at a bowling alley date. No, it takes a cell phone and Facebook for that to happen.

#societygoingtohellonarocketsled.


5 comments:

  1. The other thing is that kids don't go bowling anymore

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  2. Ohhhh Czabe has reached that magical age where he thinks the good ol' days were actually good. I look forward to his posts about kicking kids off his lawn

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  3. Kids also don't speak any longer, they text and e-mail. Personality is a dying attribute.

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  4. Czabe, when you were a teen were you trying to everything under the sun to lose your virginity? What a difference 30 years makes, eh?

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  5. Get off my lawn!!! These damn kids and their wacky technology....alright, everybody back to my basement with 6 HDTVs, surround sound, satellite links, premier tv channels, etc, etc, etc.

    Take a breath Czabe...you are starting to sound like the principle from Breakfast Club.

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