Wednesday, February 1, 2012

It's Up... and It Is.... GOOOOODDD!

Once upon a time when I was a little middle class punk, probably 10 years old, living on the mean streets of McLean, VA, I dreamed of kicking field goals in the NFL for my favorite team, the Washington Redskins.

This is what white kids dream about. At least the kids in my neighborhood.

Of course, I had to take it a step farther. Once I found some unused 10 foot long baseboard strips my dad had saved in the basement next to the washer and dryer. I pulled them suckers out, nailed them to the split rail fence on the side of the house, and then went to town with my red and yellow two-tone nerf football.

Fast forward to age 43, and having been dumb enough to purchase enough property to indulge in fiscally irresponsible projects, I decided to see just how far PVC pipes from Home Depot and my rudimentary understanding of engineering could take me.

Well, here it is.

Not bad. But it's also a very crude 1.0 version. I forgot the streamers on top, and I am too lazy to take it down and fix it. Also, the final-final version will get the requisite neon yellow paint job (anybody know what pantone code # that is?).

I also just sorta jerry-rigged the posts with duct tape and cardboard so that they would fit together snugly. The cement holes are also pretty half-assed, I used just a small tub of anchor rail cement and threw some dirt on top.

I would like to make a "t-style" goalpost once I get this section of the property graded out and re-seeded to accomodate a nearly 80 yard field. I think I can do it with a larger PVC base post (probably 6" in outer diameter) and a crossbar of reinforced 4" O.D. PVC pipe connected in the middle with some sort of "t-connector."

The uprights are a little more tricky.

The 2" PVC pipes I used here, are approximately 23' from ground to tip. Not bad, but a regulation NFL goalpost is a monstrous 40' from ground to tip. Too tall. I'd like to get 30 feet and call it a day.

For that, however, I think I need to order some custom aluminum or light steel poles, preferably 10' each that interlock (so I can break the goalpost down and store it in the summer). These will be more rigid than the PVC pipes.

My concern, is how thick do I need the aluminum/steel poles to be, so that a DOINK off one of the uprights doesn't bend it? Guess I'll just have to use trial and error.

Now, the only thing left, is for me to get a kicking lesson. Frankly, I suck. I am showing you the 2 out of 10 kicks that fly decent. The others, pretty squirrelly. Maybe I can call Graham Gano over at Redskin Park?

How much do you think he charges?

If not him, does anybody have one of the Zendejas brothers numbers?


  1. ROFLMAO!!!
    Never grow up Steve, Never grow up!

  2. Next time you're in WI, I'll teach you how to kick. Barefoot of course

  3. Living the dream most of us only dream about - thanks Czabe - keep it up!

  4. Winning Father of the Year one glorious upgrade at a time. Well done, sir!

  5. I noticed that on both kicks, you need to keep your head down a little longer. Pulling your head up will throw off the entire motion. Also, let your kicking leg pull your entire body through the ball. You looked pretty good there.

  6. I'm diggin' the Tebow jersey you're wearing in these clips, Czabe.


  7. Hey Czabe: Long time listener, love the show. I love your super slo-mo video camera. Can you tell me the brand name of the video camera? I'd love to get one also. Thanks

  8. When you are striking the ball...your toe is pointed upward. That is a no no. Keep that ankle locked, and that toe pointed down, and you will have a firmer strike with more accuracy and power.

  9. Czabe, Have you thought of using aluminum flagpoles for the uprights on version 2.0? They would have a slight taper but would be good enough for the backyard bowl.

  10. Wouldn't concrete have worked better than cement in the post hole?

  11. Nice job! You've erected a goalpost FROM THE 60'S!! By the way - Did you put it on the goal line?

  12. Steve, I am seriously tempted to build you a /proper/ goalpost. If you have the dimensions, I have the welder. Call next time you are visiting B&B (I visit VA at least once a year, and would like to indulge in a little NFL fantasy myself once on a while).