Revenge of the Rules Nerds

Well, that didn't take long.

The NFL season is always sure to produce several calls by the refs that baffle, infuriate, and generally create a week's worth of griping on sports talk radio.

But here we go. Week one, and the beer swilling masses are already up in arms over the Megatron negated game winning touchdown.

As they should be.

Nobody likes a rules ninny, and this league is becoming as technical and litigious as your cell phone company on early termination rules.

When things look like a catch, they should be called just that - a catch.

How on earth could the NFL rulebook allow for something as vague as "the process" of making a catch enter the rules? The process? Process? (insert high pitched, Jim Mora-esque voice).

You talking, process?

The fact that the NFL also has a definition of a "second act" during a catch, is proof positive that even they can't truly define when that "process" ends.

Fans bitch about the refs all the time in the NFL. Sometimes, rightfully so.

I bitch about the rule book. It is a bloated mess.

And get this, the NFL won't even put the full rulebook on their website. They have a rules "digest" but the full megillah is only available by going through the NFL Media site, which requires a password.

SIDE NOTE: When I went to use the phrase "full magilla" I stopped to wonder: "What the hell is that from?" Well, I found out!

It’s really spelled megillah, and it’s the Hebrew word for a scroll. In particular, it refers to one of five books of the Old Testament, namely Song of Songs, Ruth, Lamentations, Ecclesiastes, and Esther, which are read on certain Jewish special days. The most common reference, though, is to the Book of Esther, which is read in its entirety at the feast of Purim.

Anyway, back to my point. The rulebook is a farce. The NFL has tried to define every single act, concept, and possible athletic move in writing.

No wonder they have tied themselves in knots!

The rulebook needs to be made more SIMPLE, and in many instances, LESS specific. I know that is counter-intuitive, but think about it: somebody at the end of all the rulebook's legalese is still going to have to make the call.

A judgment call.

You can't reduce all judgment calls to black and white, legally binding rules that fit all occasions.

Just like the horrible Troy Polomalu call vs. the Colts in the playoffs.

Polamalu intercepted a pass, rolled to the ground, then fumbled the ball while getting up. The play was initially ruled an interception and fumble, but after viewing the instant replay, referee Pete Morelli ruled the play an incomplete pass. His rationale was that Polamalu did not make a "football move" after intercepting the pass but before fumbling the ball, and therefore did not demonstrate possession of the ball. The NFL later released a statement saying that Morelli's interpretation was incorrect, and that the interception should have been upheld.

This time, the NFL has not thrown their own refs under the bus. Instead, they are doubling down on stupid.

"I'd like to see a little commonsense injected into the officiating," Jags coach Jack Del Rio said Monday.

That's exactly what the league doesn't want.

"What we try to do with any rule is eliminate the gray area," NFL vice president of officiating Carl Johnson said.

"It reminds me of the tuck rule, which a lot of people didn't know," he said. "But it was properly ruled on the field. Now it is a nonevent because the fans know it.

"Now we can further educate the fans and media on what the proper requirements are for a catch."

Now, it could just be me, but I don't think holding up the NFL's OTHER absurdly abstract and drippingly unfair call helps the NFL's image on this. Yet, this is apparently what league administrators get all hard just thinking about.

And if you really want to "educate" the fans on the rules, why not start with putting the full 137 page PDF "Rule and Casebook" on the front page of NFL.com so we can print a copy, and keep it by the ottoman on Sundays.