The Stubbornly Un-sympathetic "Stosh"

Philosophical question: “When is it acceptable to ‘whine’ in sports?”

In general, I think you are not allowed to whine about: the weather, the referees, the schedule, the fans, or the announcers.

But an injury, if significant enough, you bet.

So I am watching the game last night at Buffalo Wild Wings in Urbana, MD with some of my boyees: Rhodesie (aka “The Greaser”), J.P. and another friend of theirs who goes simply by “Stosh.”

Stosh was hilarious. Claims to be a huge Ravens fan, but is also a Redskins fan. Claims he was once a Patriots fan (when Steve Grogan played) but isn’t a fan now. Guy works for the Baltimore Orioles, but is a big hockey player.

Oh, and he’s a huge Ocho Cinco fan. Massive.

Stosh’s proudest Christmas gift, which he was wearing, was a t-shirt ordered from Ocho Cinco’s own website that said “Child Pleeeze…” on the front in orange, with “Ocho Cinco 85” on the back.

Stosh claims he’s “great for the game of football.”

Stosh is white.

I feel compelled to say that, because he smashes every preconceived stereotype of a fan you would ever expect.

So anyway, with Texas getting drilled 24-6 in the second half, with their true freshman back-up to Colt McCoy struggling to even get a ball airborne, Stosh says:

“Now, I don’t wanna hear Texas fans whining about losing their quarterback after this game….”

To quote Jimmy Football in the Bud Light commercials: “Whhhaaaaahhhhaaaaa???”

I said: “Stosh, the dude was their All-American stud. He’s won more games than any QB in Texas history. They were looking really strong before he went out. What the hell are you saying? Of course Texas fans can whine. That changed the entire game!”

Stosh, undeterred simply said: “That’s why you need depth on your team.”

“Depth!” I said. “How many All-American quarterbacks do they need to carry at one time? Three? Some guys are just irreplaceable.”

Stosh wasn’t giving it up. He says they should have let this kid play more in blowouts to get him ready.

“Stosh, I don’t know if you are aware of this, but this is THE NATIONAL CHAMPIONSHIP game! Alabama is ridiculously good! The kid was playing HIGH SCHOOL football about 10 months ago! I’m amazed he hasn’t pooped himself yet.”

Well, it was a good natured exchange, and I didn’t really change Stosh’s mind. Maybe he’s correct on some level. I just didn’t see it. While Texas fans can’t honestly claim they would have surely won that game with McCoy, they can at least enjoy a little “woe is me” about it.

That’s when about 5 minutes later I said: “Hey Stosh, what did you say about Pearl Harbor? ‘I don’t want to hear the US Navy whining about losing all their battleships and stuff. They should have had another Pearl Harbor somewhere nearby, like on Maui.”

Much laughter amongst the fellas. ‘Tis why it’s great to get out of the house, and enjoy some free flowing “manversation” – as I like to call it – every now and then.

“Spoken like a Ravens fan,” I said, “whose only Super Bowl is due entirely to the fact that Tony Siragusa FELL on Rich Gannon’s shoulder on the 3rd play of the game.”

The trash talking resumed. The true freshman almost pulled off a miracle, although it was sadly only AFTER Stosh had headed for the snowy roads home.

All hail Alabama, and that joyless prick Nick Saban. With our without McCoy, they are deserving Champs, and the program looks like a juggernaut running at full power.

Woe to the rest of the SEC and, of course, Auburn fans.

The Tide, oh, it is rollin’!