Wednesday, February 13, 2013

The Swedish "Black Widow"

Meet ladies professional golfer Daniela Holmqvist.


Got bit by a black widow spider. Kept golfing. Take that, Priscilla Arena of Long Island, NY!
As Holmqvist's leg started to swell and the pain became intense, she made the quick decision to take matters into her own hands (she'd just been informed that a Black Widow bite can kill a child in as little as 30 minutes). She pulled a tee out of her pocket ("it was the only thing I had handy," she told Svensk Golf) and used it to cut open the wound so she could squeeze out the venom and keep it from spreading inside her body. 
"A clear fluid came out," she said. "It wasn't the prettiest thing I've ever done, but I had to get as much of it out of me as possible."
Awesome. And she finished the round with a 74.

I kid you not.

Which reminds me of a true story! I was once golfing with my boss, the esteemed Tod Castleberry. We were at Four Streams GC in Maryland, when he laced his tee-shot into an area of long grass and gunch next to the lake on #8.

After venturing in to look for it, Mr. C came ROCKETING out of there, cussing, and removing both his shirt and shorts at the same time.


After getting dotted by at least 2 dozen yellow jackets (god, I HATE those fuckers! Why the attitude, 'Jackets? Why?) we let a group play through. Mr. C, being a gamer, played on gingerly.

As he lagged his putt for bogey up to about 5 feet, I looked at him sympathetically and said: "Pick it up Winnie The Pooh, you're good."

I think he threw his putter at my head. But when it was all said and done, he too could appreciate a good smart ass line!

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